As a child I loved visiting my hometown of Beaumont, TX. All of my mother’s siblings lived there with their children- my cousins. It was a beautiful time to grow up. We played outside for hours under the sun. We dressed in plain clothes that left us free to run and play tag. In my mind I knew that inevitably we would have to leave and head back to Houston, a 1 hour and 30 minute drive West of Beaumont. I often cried because I didn’t want to leave my loved ones and the fun times we were creating. These moments are just as hard for me as an adult. I want to visit with my family but I am very aware of the real life I have that does not include them. I’d like to share with you a personal journey of me becoming a better person. A person that is building and leaving a legacy of substance.
Write a letter to a loved one: In college I had an amazing mentor. To me she is like an angel on earth. She was the kindest and most patient person I had ever known. She did things simply because she wanted to give to others and make their day genuinely better. One year I randomly received a letter in the mail from her. I thought this is so sweet that she thought of me. I was mind blown when I got to the bottom of the letter, and she stated that she simply wanted to share some of her birthday joy with others so she had taken time to write us letters! Statistics show that about 97% of communication between parents to grown children is done via the phone. I‘m known to send a text and take weeks to reply :/ I implore you to grab some stationary and a pen and send a letter to your loved ones. I nearly cried from joy and I’m sure that they, too, would feel the tiny, warm pricks behind their eyes.
Volunteer: I had the pleasure of volunteering at a nursing home a few years ago. My colleagues and I would visit the elderly at this facility on a regular basis. Our first visit was during the winter holidays where we sang Christmas carols. Many residents enjoyed us while others simply did not want to open up to strangers who only came because it was Christmas time. Volunteerism increases about 50% around the holidays. Our group continued going down to do Motown night and other activities. It warmed our hearts as the attendance grew for our events and they started sharing their life stories. Carve out time to go and volunteer or make it into a day date with your partner.
Show up for your partner: I am all for the cheesy romantic comedies and doing things that will make my partner roll his eyes because I just said the corniest thing possible. At any stage in your relationship, you can build a physical love chart or virtual mood board. Include:
- Photos from your first date or wedding album.
- Your partners favorite snacks
- Your partners “happy” songs
- Your favorite cologne or perfume they wear
- Your partners best friends
- The dreams you’ve planned to do together
Keep it going as you hit new milestones. It can be a fun project together or you can unveil it during a special moment. Howeveryou choose to use it, put your heart out there. This works great for friendships, too.
Self-care: During quarantine back in March of 2020, I cleaned my house daily, I worked out twice a day, took my dog on long walks, learned to play chess, tried new meals, and binge-watched so much tv. It was surely a scary time, but it was also a time I had no choice but to slow down. As cities reopened, I remembered feeling exhausted from doing one outside activity which formerly wouldn’t have taken any mental energy to achieve. Becoming a better person also includes being a better person to yourself. Keep one mini promise to yourself at the least. Studies show that 80% of the population intends to be cognizant about keeping and implementing regular self-care practices. For me, I am learning one sign language word or phrase a day and not working on the weekends- as a small business owner I often found myself working 11 to 15 days straight. Often said and often true: you can’t pour from an empty cup.
The definition of be is to exist. How we choose to exist is up to us to define and achieve. For me, I want to exist with a positive outlook on life and being a positive influence for my family, friends, and community. I was once given the instruction to leave things nicer than how I found them. I hope that the takeaway from the post is something that encourages you to do the same. In your own way. In your own time.
by Jasmine Cormier
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